3/27/2014

Oh man...

Yesterday was an interesting and emotional day for me. I intended on writing a post, but got too busy in my life. I attended a study session for my Systematic Theology II exam. I  have struggled with this class since I began last semester. I have not been a Christian for long. It has almost been three years since I decided to accept Christ. Because of this I have not spent my entire life in the Church as others have, and so deep theological understandings do not come to me as quickly as they might come to others who already have a basic understanding of scripture, the atonement, Luther, Calvin, and so on. However, I have really surprised myself because for the most part I have been able to obtain a basic understanding of most of the topics in class. But the exam that we are currently studying for, which is in an hour, I do not feel like I understand any of it. I feel so inadequate and discouraged. It is the first exam of which I have no confidence that I will at least pass. So, like a good hard working student, I put off studying. I attended the study session and felt myself slowly sinking further and further into the pit of complete ignorance and stupidity. I came back, and panicked every few minutes. Finally, I got some food in my system and began to study. And then came the next addition to my panic train, the internet was completely down. There was no hope. All of the material I needed was online. So I moved on and did other schoolwork all while secretly panicking about my complete and total lack of knowledge. I skipped chapel this morning and studied instead, so we will see how it goes. It was also emotional because I watched a lot of emotional things. For instance, "Soul Surfer." Like was it necessary to cry that much?

On a brighter note counseling this morning was amazing. We have been working on what I want to accomplish. For me this is more confidence and a positive self-image or self-worth. We stated things that have kept me from it, and how I can achieve it last time. This time we focused on the risks of addressing certain items of my past. We also discussed the risk of returning to certain coping mechanisms and ideals that were not helpful to me. The conversation was tough, but it was empowering to see how far I have come, and how far I have to go. The empowerment came from how far I have come, but the excitement and inspiration came from how achievable the "how far I have to go" seems now. God is doing amazing things in my life, and I am so thankful to be along for the ride. Counseling has truly been a blessing that I will miss while I am away from school this summer. But I will be too busy being distracted by my great adventures in New Zealand to recognize those feelings of temporary loss.

Another thing I am dealing with is loss. I have a presentation coming up in my Youth Ministries Strategies class on teaching youth leaders how to deal with grief and loss amongst their youths. I have been struggling with this because I do not even know how to deal with grief myself, let alone how to teach someone how to deal with others' grief. The ultimate issue at this moment is I do not know what to say because their really is no answer. Everyone grieves differently, and everyone needs something different. Ultimately it is just about being there and trying your best. There is no easy fix equation.

Also, our teams for Res. Life next year have been decided. Some of the girls who will be new to Res. Life on our team next year have tried to initiate a time for all of us to hangout. However, I am hesitant. It is not that I do not like them, or do not want to be on their team. That is the complete opposite. I am so excited for them to discover Res. Life and all the amazing things that come with it. I am excited to watch them grow and develop. However, I am not ready to give up my current team just yet. I want to cherish these last few weeks that I have with them before most of us depart. Part of me feels like meeting up with my new team forces me to start leaving behind my old team, and I am just not ready for that. In addition, I remember last year when I was initiated onto the team. Res. Life had this big meeting where everyone who had been chosen for staff next year came together, and we all met each. We then broke off into our teams and got to know each other. Some of us knew each, but for me I did not know anyone. It was nerve-wrecking, but it was exciting. It was my first time getting to know my team, and I will always cherish that moment. I feel like meeting before this overall Res. Life meeting takes away that certain majestical element of meeting each other first the first time in context of Res. Life. I could not imagine it any other way. It is like I told my new team in a response message that I sent them, "I'm in the same boat as Emily," Emily (name changed for privacy) had previously stated that maybe we should hold off on the meeting, and if we do meet up we should all be there, not missing a few of us, "I'm eager to meet all of you, but we should all be there. I just remember what it was like to meet my team last year, and there was a sort of something that cannot be explained when we all first came together and shared our names with each other, only to realize that we're all about to embark on this amazing life-changing adventure, together. And you just don't get that when one of us is missing."

Last night, I had a very interesting dream. Part of which a friend of mine surprised me with a brand new car. She left notes to me around me house that were very amazing. Apparently she won the car, but had no need for it. So she gave it to me. This friend was someone I have not talked to in a while. She did some things to me that I have not really forgiven because I did not feel like she was really sorry. God has been bringing me through a season of forgiveness, and I think He brought her up in my dream to remind me that I need to choose to forgive her as well. I needed to accept her love, and not hold against her decisions that she had made in the past. I am learning that I am not responsible for other's decisions or actions, but I am responsible for how I react to them and how I let them affect me.

The lesson I have learned from today:
I learned that life can be rough and you can still be happy. It is okay to be happy. It okay to be stressed, worried, sad, and upset about missing people, but still be happy overall. It does not mean that all the other emotions do not matter, or that you are bipolar, it is just you choose to be happy despite the circumstances.
I have learned that I have come far, but I still have a long ways to go. The hope however, is that I can still progress, grow, and change for the better. I am capable of doing so. It can be achieved. There is a beauty within that.
I have learned the beauty in forgiveness. We all think that we want it, but really we feel much more comfortable with holding hard to grudges. We become so comfortable with our pain and anger against others that we do not want to give it up. Instead we say we forgive, but we do not. We hold on tight to our pain afraid of what it might be like if we just let it go. I have learned that amazing freedom that comes with choosing forgiveness, and I am so thankful to God for revealing it.
I have also learned that I must try my best at everything I do, and be willing to ask for help. I was struggling with my Theology exam so much that I refused to study. But this was wrong. I cannot just give up and expect help. I must rely on God, but I must also know that I honor and worship God through my work. 

3/25/2014

First, I do not know if you have noticed, but I have changed my blog layout a little bit. I thought the old one was outdated, and made things hard to read. I had originally changed it to a beach in the background since it is titled, "There is a Tide in the Affairs of Men *College*" But I did not think it captured the important part of the title, "College". I think that this image captures college. Or at least my experience. 

Second, I am really loving this new breath of life that I have received. I explained it as well as I can in my last blog. So I will try not to re-write the same blog entry. But it is just so refreshing. 

This morning in Chapel Mike Hayes spoke in the Conn Center, which is where I attended service. For those of you reading who do not know, at Lee University we are required to go to Chapel twice a week. Once on Tuesday, and once on Thursday. Chapel is a service like modern day church where we worship to modern music and listen to a speaker. A lot of Lee students complain about Chapel because it gets in their way, but I love it. Most of the time the speaker has a very relevant message. Also, there is something unique and special about the fact that twice a week the entire campus comes together (in theory). There is a certain beauty in that. It makes me feel closer to my peers and fellow students. It makes me feel more of a part of something. Anyways, Hayes spoke on two men from the Boston Marathon. 

Jeff Bauman

and Carlos Arrendando.

Jeff Bauman was attending the Boston marathon to support his girlfriend running in the race. Carlos had two sons. One who died in war and another who committed suicide as a result of a progressing pain that developed from his brother's death. Carlos was in attendance at the Boston marathon to support someone run in honor of his son in the military, and to support another team that was running in support of suicide awareness.

When the bomb went off Jeff was was injured. Carlos ran to his aid, and played a major part in saving his life. 

Hayes also spoke on the story of Joseph from the Bible. For those who do not know the story Joseph was the eleventh brother of many. His father had many sons with other women, but Joseph was the son from his true love, and so Joseph's father favored him. One day out of jealousy Joseph's brothers took him to the desert and threw him into a hole. Joseph was found and sold into slavery. His owner's wife constantly hit on him, and asked him to sleep with her. He refused. One day Joseph refused and tried to run. As he ran the woman took his garment off and screamed that he had raped her. He was then thrown into jail. While in jail he interpreted the dreams of men who served the Pharaoh. One day the Pharaoh had a dream, and so the men referred him to Joseph. Joseph interpreted his dream and was appointed as one of the leaders of the kingdom. Joseph's brothers came to him, not knowing it was him, in order to receive food in a time of famine. Instead of becoming angry and punishing them, he told them who he was and asked them to bring the rest of the family to him so they could be one again. He saved them from the famine even though he had every right to punish them and gain revenge. 

Hayes used both of these stories to show that in times of great despair and adversity we have one of two choices, "grudges or forgiveness". 

Once again God was speaking to me. Reminding me that I need to forgive and let go. I need to follow the example of Carlos and Jeff who decided to allow their experience to make them stronger. I need to follow the example of Joseph who forgave and welcomed his brothers. I need to forgive and grow. I choose forgiveness. 

Today I also had my one on one with my RD. My RD is my Residential Director. She is basically my boss. One on ones, as I explained in my previous blog post, are times that my director and I work together to grow me and discuss how I can best serve my hall and my team. This time my director asked me how my life was. I answered, "Pretty good." She asked why? I do not know why she always surprises me with that question. I should know that she will never let me go by simply answering without explaining. Haha. But I love it. I told her most of the stuff that I explained in my last post. That I have chosen to forgive, accept positive not negative, and not to fear or be angry or bitter, and how enlightening that is. She asked me how I was working towards these things. I shared a few things. For example, every morning I write down three positive things that I like about myself and a positive memory from my past. Also, when someone compliments me I make an effort to not reject it but value it. I have also chosen not to fear or be angry or bitter. That last one is a weird on because it is abstract. I told my director that I was not really sure how, but I was beginning to forgive things that I never thought I could, letting go of fear, anger, and bitterness, and accepting the positive. She said that she thinks it is party what I have been doing, and the other part is God. I completely agree. In fact, I know that is what is going on. That is how I felt before she even said that, but for some reason I felt weird saying it. But I know that it is only by God's grace that I am able to do these things because I have tried to do it on my own before, and all it has done is dug me farther into the ground. It is only by Gods grace that I can do anything. That is the truth. 

I do not want to mislead you by saying that everything is perfect because it is not. But life seems to be more free, more exciting, and more happy. I like it. I think I am going to keep it this way. 

My life is not too exciting as far as great adventures and all, but I decided I would end this with my to-do list so you could see what I have been up to. 

My To-Do List:

• I want to make my handwriting look like the cursive from old-timey handwriting. 

(like this)

This is my progress so far. It still needs work, but it's getting there.

• Theology Exam on Thursday 3/27
• Theology Study session 3/26
• Print out housing contract and my profile signature/fill it out
• Sign up for living arrangements next year 3/27 (NORA THIRD NORTH FOR LIFE)
• Finish reading "Blue Like Jazz" 
• Finish Christian Ethics Presentation slides, video, and definitions 3/31
• buy a book to track finances in. 
• Meet with a new friend on Thursday 3/27 
• COMPLETE STAFF EVALUATIONS
• Download powerpoints from all classes
• get stuff off of ipod and on to computer
• prepare youth ministry presentation on grief and prepare five questions 
• Start planning out next year
• Hang out with staff
• build relationships on hall
• Think about how to decorate the hall next year
• Room check
• Smoke detector check
• Live

New Tides

Life has been pretty great lately. 

I went on spring break last week, and it was really refreshing. It was not as adventurous as our break to Florida last year, but I think that was exactly what I needed. 

My former youth pastor preached two really great sermons while we were there. In fact, I really need to start listening to his podcasts because it seems that every time I listen to him I get something great from it. He has been speaking on a series called "Soul Detox". The discussions are things that you need to get out of your life. The first week he discussed the idea of removing toxic behaviors. One of those behaviors being negative thoughts, and that is definitely something that I struggle with. You can tell me one thing that I have done wrong, and twenty good things, and I will cling to that bad thing and throw away all the good things. In fact, sometimes I will even go so far that I will pick out every word you said from that one bad thing, stretching the words so that I seem way worse than I really am. I will meditate on it, and consume it for every meal until it eats away my insides and leaves me writhing in pain. So needless to say, I needed that message. 

The second message I got to hear was on removing toxic emotions or thoughts. This meant recognizing positive truths and not clinging onto negative thoughts. It also meant letting go of anger, bitterness, and fear. This was another message that I needed to hear. 

Before I left Florida I had realized that I had misplace my student i.d. and keys. I estimated that replacing all of them would cost me, at the least, $180. Which is college context really feels like thousands because every dollar is worth is worth a thousand bucks, and every quarter is worth a million, especially on laundry day. I once even heard someone offer five dollars for a dollar in quarters. So needless to say I would usually be quick to anger in a situation like this. I would beat things up, and possibly even beat myself up, whether that means mentally, emotionally, or physically. But this time I simply remembered my pastor's words, and was slow to anger. I trusted in God, and did not fear. In fact, lately God has been slowly removing my fears. Suddenly my trip to New Zealand does not take my suffocate me because of the idea of being on a plane for 24 hours, but rather takes my breath away in a whole new way, an exciting way. 

Also, when I arrived back in Cleveland I received an email about my position in Residential Life for next year. Residential Life and Housing, or Res. Life is one of the main reasons why I have not written on here. One, it makes me too busy. Two, I have so many stories but they involve my residents and for confidentiality reasons I can not share them. I was in my room talking on the phone with my dad when my former senior R.A., someone I miss very much, had yelled down the hall for me. "Dot! Dot!" I could hear her, but I could not find a way to answer since I was in the middle of a conversation with my dad, and trying to fill out FASFA with him. She came into my room filled with excitement and asked me about my job position. I told her I had not really looked at my email. But the issue was, my dad was on my computer through a connection that connects his computer to my desktop so he can do whatever he needs to. Because of this I could not access my email until he was done. I was able to ask him to pause for a moment. I read the email, but because of everything that was going on I did not completely understand it, but I was sure that it said that I was a R.A. in Nora. This was true. My former senior R.A. asked me how I felt. I had no idea how I felt. There were too many thoughts in my mind. But once she left and my dad hung up I began to feel. The thing is I applied to be senior R.A. for Nora, not R.A. So I was a little disappointed. I began to become bitter. I began to question, "Why not me?" "What have I done wrong?" "Why don't they like." I began to tear myself down by telling myself I was terrible at my job, and there was nothing I could do right. But then my pastor's words came to me, something like this, "Learn to rejoice in other's blessings. And learn to be grateful and recognize what God has done in your life. Do not let bitterness take over you." So I sat back and really began to reflect. The emotions I was experiencing was actually not bitterness or jealousy, but rather a feeling that this was unexpected and I was taken aback. Once I began to think about, this was what I wanted. I was going to be working with Freshmen again. This does not mean that I am terrible because if that was the case I would not be rehired. And once I found out who got the senior R.A. position for Nora I was incredibly excited, and realized that position belonged to her. I am proud and honored to be on staff with her next year. So all that to say that I have learned to rejoice with others and not let bitterness take over me. 

With this letting go of fear has done the most for me. It has settled my stomach disorder, which is AMAZING. But it has made life more enjoyable. When I entered my one on one with my RD unafraid of what might happen I find myself more relaxed, and really doing what I am there for. (one on ones are time where it's just me and my RD [my boss] talking about how I can grow more, and become better) I have found that classes are more enjoyable. Life is more adventurous. 

With all of this I have obtained an amazing sense of freedom that has given me a great sense of happiness. No, my life is not perfect, but I am okay with that. I am very happy to be where I am. And I am glad and completely blessed to have the life that I have. 

I have also been more devoted to my devotions. I have been doing devotions religiously almost every day. But that was it, I was doing it "religiously" and not relationally. Once I began to read with a passion to get to know God more the scripture began to really pour into my heart. 

In addition, my first time with my counselor in weeks went over really well. This was because I came in without a fearful spirit, and came in with an excited spirit. We began to discuss how we could define counseling so that we were no longer coming in each week trying to figure out what we should talk about. We discussed what two things I wanted to change about myself. I said I wanted more confidence, and a more positive self-image. With this we developed two goals that would help me to get to that point. One of those goals is that each morning I have to say to myself three things that I like about myself. This has been great. With that I have begun practicing more of this throughout the day. I have allowed myself to recognize things that I like about myself, and not pay attention to the negative thoughts. I have learned to throw away things that have been said to me that are not truth, and absorb things that are. 

Another thing that I have picked up is humility. Honestly, I believe that I have pretty much been really humble. But sometimes I mix up humility with self-pity or self-detrementing. I tear myself down and belittle myself. But this is not humility. In fact, in my youth strategies class the guest speaker said that these two things were not humble because they still included self. He said that humility was simple not thinking of oneself. I have tried practicing that they last few days, and I have found that it really helps. I actually feel more value within myself when I think less about myself. 

The last thing I will tell you is about one great adventure I had today. To most of you this will not seem very adventurous, but to me it is. Today for my Christian Ethics class we visited a nursing home. We were to talk to one of the residents for at least 25 minutes. I was very nervous. I am not very good at interacting with the elderly. I got placed with Ms. Imogene. I was very lucky because from the moment I stepped in she made me feel very welcomed. She asked me about my life, and I asked her about hers. What I learned is that she lived in the mountains of Georgia her entire life. She worked as a nurse until 1990. She has a few kids, I never go the exact number, as well as grand children. Two of her grandchildren are principals at local schools. She has one great-grandaughter who is going to need heart surgery, and she's only three months old. She moved to Cleveland because he husband needed dialysis. He passed away three years ago. She was in residential care for two months. She said that was the longest she had ever been away from home. She was injured and needed surgery, and so she was recovering in the home. But she was able to return home on Monday, and she was beyond elated. I was excited for her. Her passion for life was amazing. She made sure that in the little time that we had she poured into my life. She told me to retain as much as I could in school because no one could ever take that away from me. She told me that it was important to accept help, and that we all need to help each other in order to get along in life. She said we cannot live without each other. Her wisdom was so great, and her beautiful icy blue eyes were so young. She reminded me of my great-grandmother who passed away my freshman year of college. She made me regret not visiting my great-grandmother more often. I will never forget Imogene. I wish her the most happiness as she returns home. 

Here's a few things to take away if you must:

1. Don't allow the negative thoughts to manifest within you. Evict them and welcome in the positive

2. Let go of anger, fear, and bitterness. They are no good, and will do no good. But the only way to do so is to ask for God's help. Trust me, I've tried. 

3. If you have the opportunity, talk with the elderly. They have wisdom that you will find no where else.

4. Sit back. Relax. And enjoy this wonderful, amazing life we have been so graciously blessed with. 

Summer

Here I am one week away from officially declaring my summer break over. For most normal kids this is one of the most disappointing times of the year. For me it's the most exciting.

I have never really enjoyed summer to be honest. Growing up summer just meant the time where I laid around at home, did nothing, and tried to find a way to exercise my mind. I love going to school. I love seeing people everyday. I love having purpose. I love having a reason to get up in the morning. This year I was very thankful for summer. 

As I prepared for summer, three months ago, I had great plans. I wanted to get a job and work hard. I wanted to start taking care of my body by getting into running. I wanted to stay active. But God had other plans. 

I turned in job application after job application, and yet nothing seemed to work out. I grew very frustrated. All I wanted to do was work hard and get some money that would gain me comfort in the months to come. But nothing happened. I thought I needed to work hard, but God knew I needed rest. 

I ran day after day for a week. I got out there and ran until I couldn't anymore. Each day I ran longer. But after one week I ended up in the hospital. Turns out my gallbladder, not that great. The doctor's believe that it over contracts which creates a feeling like that of having a heart attack. So I had to lay back and not run in order to try and keep myself from ending up in the hospital for longer than six hours. However, the doctor's ordered me to do something else. Change my diet, or risk surgery. So I was instructed to aim for foods with low fat. So instead of milk, pizza, McDonald's, and many other things I was used to I had to move to low fat yogurt, broccoli and rice, and anything that had little to no fat. I thought I needed to run hard everyday to get back in shape. God knew my oncoming weakness, and lead me to change my health habits through a change of diet instead. 

Lastly, I thought that I should build the strength of my friendships. So I wanted to hangout everyday. I wanted to get out and work in order to find new friends. I wanted to start helping out at my church and get closer to my friends there. I wanted to get out. But God had other plans. A much better plan that I never expected. I often felt too sick to go out, which is something I hate. So I stayed in a lot. But I decided to not let my summer go to waste. So I decided to start working on the house. I began to mow the lawn like crazy. It came to a point where I was mowing the lawn twice a week. I just take so much enjoyment in mowing the grass. I started giving myself a weekly schedule. Kitchen on Monday. Bathroom on Tuesday. Living room on Wednesday. Laundry on Thursday. Vacuuming on Friday. Mow the lawn on Saturday. I kept to it and the house began to get cleaner. And slowly but surely the moods of the people who live in my house began to get better. On top of that I have gotten a lot closer to my parents through all the time I have spent here. My relationship with my family has gotten so much better. I am the closest to them that I have ever been. That is probably the best thing God has had in store for me this summer. 

So with all this being said, I am so ready for school to start again. I have been praying all summer for my hall, my roommate, my former roommate, my friends, my grades, and just about everything, and I can't wait to see God fulfill those prayers. I am going to miss the people here in Maryland, but if there is one thing that being away at college has taught me is that 10 hours isn't that far away. 

See you in a week Lee University. :)




Did you like what you read? Check out my other blog, "You're Killing Me Smalls"

The Decision is Yours

Never once in your life have you ever been in a place like here. You have a decision to make. What will this be to you? It can be the worst. It can be the best. The decision is up to you. Never once in your life have you ever been so free to decide. Your past is already decided. Your future has yet to be written. There's no one here to tell you what to make of this. The decision is yours. So, what's it going to be? The best? Or the worst?






Like what you read? Check out my other blog "You're Killing Me Smalls"

One Year at Lee

Okay, so I feel terrible that a year ago I vowed to write on here everyday. That was a stupid vow. Though not impossible, it wasn't very likely. I have learned a lot here at college. 

First, I learned a lot academically, as everyone expects to. I've learned my studying habits. I've learned my procrastination habits. (That last one is more prominent than the first one) I've learned lots and lots of information that I am not even go to begin to bore you with. I've learned how to take tests and exams, and write papers. I've learned how to survive classes that just don't seem possible. I've learned never to grieve over a current grade. As long as they are still current, and the class is still going, grades can always change. I have also learned to never be overconfident about a grade because as long as they are still current, and the class is still going, grades can always change. I have learned that speaking with your professor is probably one of the best things that you can do. I have learned that conquering procrastination, and making best friends with your planner and organization is one of the best things a student can do. However, as surprising as it may sound I have learned much more that can not be put on an academic scale.

Coming here has been one of the hardest, most enjoyable things I have ever done. I knew that coming here would change me, but I underestimated just how much. The first few nights I was here I was in tears at night as I laid my head on my pillow. I was happy to be here, but all I could think of was my family and friends back home. However, I did eventually grow out of that. So for all of you out there who find yourself in the same situation, please don't let it keep you from succeeding. Though they may be a little further away the people you are missing are still there for you and are always just a letter, phone call, Skype session, Facebook post, tweet, text message, email, and so on away. Don't be afraid to be the person to reach out and make contact.

The title of this blog is "'There is a Tide in the Affairs of Men.'*College*" This is a quote from Shakespeare's, Julius Caesar, you know, minus the *College* part. The quote states, "There is a tide in the affairs of men. Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; Omitted, all the voyage of their life is bought in shallows and in miseries. On such a full sea we are now afloat, and we must take the current when it serves, or lose ventures." The character speaking is commenting that there is a time in your life when you are going to need to make a decision. When a captain is trying to decide when to go out into the ocean they watch the tide. There is a right time and a wrong time to go out onto sea, and the captain has to keep a watchful eye in order to spot the right time. Go too late, and you might miss an opportunity. Go too early, and you might find yourself in a wicked storm. Just as captain watches the tides of the ocean, we must watch the tides of our life. We have to keep an eye out for when we should jump in. If we wait too long we could miss an opportunity, but if we get in too early we could run into a wicked storm that we are unprepared for.

This is college. College is all about ceasing the moment at the right time. You have to find out where you fit in. You have to find your comfort zone, and push its limits. You have to find what inspires you, and hold onto it. You have to find out what you want to study. There are opportunities around every corner, and you have to decide if you're going to take it or not.

A few months before I left for college I wrote a blog titled, Going Under: Rising Back Up. I spoke about the feeling that I was being pulled under by a very strong current, but it excited me. I knew that the was something for me on the other side. I knew that I was going to be ripped under, and feel for a little while that I was drowning, but in the end I was going to rise up as stronger person.

I was right. I did get ripped under. I came to a point where I felt overwhelmed, and had many breakdowns. I missed home. I missed my family. I missed my friends. I missed the familiarity. My grades were suffering. I bombed a quiz. I bombed an exam. I got sick. Nothing seemed like it was going right. I felt like I was drowning. But I rose back up. It is obvious that I am different, but in a better way. I am now more willing to step out of my comfort zone thanks to a project I did called The Yes Man Project. I am now more talkative. I am now more outgoing. I am able to be okay in a place where I know no one. I have risen up a stronger version of myself.

There is so much that I am grateful for. I grateful for the people I have met. My roommate. My friend's roommates. The girl's on my hall. Everyone here has had an impact on me, and I am so grateful. I am going to miss some of them next year as some move away, and I move to a different dorm. I have grown academically, socially, spiritually, and physically, and I am grateful for that. I am grateful for what God has done for me. I am so happy that I decided to follow His call for me to come here to Lee.

If you ever feel that God is calling you to do something, don't turn away, run towards it. It might be scary. It might make no sense. It might seem like the polar opposite of what you want to do. But I promise you it will be more than you could ever ask for. I could have never predicted how much moving here to Lee has been such a blessing to me. It has taught me that if I follow God I will land in places I could have never imagined.

Overall, moving to Lee was one of the best things to ever happen to me. I am so excited for the summer, and being able to reunite with my family and friends. But I am also so excited for next year. I have learned so much. I have seen so much. I have done so much. It only gets better from here! :)

College Assignment #5:

Keep a Journal

I know that I did not set a very good example with this for I told you I was going to keep a journal of sorts on here, but throughout this year I have been keeping several journals. I know that it does not sound interesting and it seems pointless, but it is a great way of keeping your thoughts together at a time when you feel like you're losing your mind. It is also a great way of seeing how you have grown. You do not have to go public with it, and post a blog, but at least have a journal. Guys too... That's why I called it a journal, not a diary. :)

Don't make vows, unless you intend on following through, and know that it is possible.

Follow God's call that He has for you




Like what you read? Check out my other blog "You're Killing Me Smalls" !

Coming Soon

Hey guys! I'm really sorry I haven't blogged in a while, but I am starting a new blog. (Imagine that) :) It's a 30 day project. I am going to post a link on here, but it won't be for a while because I want to have it started up for a little before people I know view it. Once things get exciting again I will check in on here! See you later!




Like what you read? Check out my other blog "You're Killing Me Smalls" !